Cinnamon Life

Image via Wikipedia

According to what I've read from Dr. Daniel Amen and his brain scan studies, cinnamon triggers lust in men and baby powder triggers lust in women. These are the real aphrodisiacs (apparently).

The cinnamon part he didn't get into, but the baby powder triggers an unconscious need in women to reproduce, which makes sense. When I wear baby powder, I always make sure I have plenty of condoms on hand, since I don't want the end result! While a woman is smelling my baby powder (a dab behind each ear), I get myself worked up by chewing on Wrigley's cinnamon gum. I smell like I have diaper rash and fresh breath. Are we all nuts?

I wish Dr. Amen had discussed the phenomenon of what makes cinnamon so attractive to men, because it really is a cool... spice? herb? I did a Wikipedia search and found out it's a bark from a tree. As a kid I ate mega loaves of toast with cinnamon sprinkled on top and never guessed I was eating tree bark! I guess I was eating trees as a child. You?

I eat trees and burn plants, that's my story. I'm trying to think ... is there another tree I've eaten?

I've eaten plenty of fruit from a tree but try to avoid eating the tree itself.

• So far, I've eaten a tree, inhaled a tree (if you count being around a campfire), seen a tree, felt a tree, and once in a while I've heard a tree, but I actually don't think it counts when a limb cracks. You really aren't hearing the tree do its natural thing. So hearing trees is on my 'to do' list, if they ever get a technology for that. They say some Native Americans can hear trees. That's so cool! ... all five senses represented. Isn't that what life is all about?

Rules of the House

Image by Nemo's great uncle via Flickr

I don't mind you coming over, but I resent you putting your ass on my stuff. Don't use my bathroom, because you'll likely be in there with your ass hanging out. Can I come to your house and put my ass on your furniture? I don't think so. What makes you think you can do it to me? A toilet is considered "furniture" by Wikipedia, by the way. No disrespecting my furniture with your habits.

As a guest, you must learn to make me, the host, coffee. Familiarize yourself with my coffee maker and I prefer it on the strong side, no sugar just cream. The guest always makes the best coffee, studies have shown.

You must not discriminate against me based on what you might find browsing my DVDs (by my computer).

You have the right to pet my dog at any time and also take her for a walk.

Any pot you find belongs to the owner.